Indulging a life long preoccupation with the color purple and it's affiliates, I recently wore a magenta bandanna to work, though at some point throughout the day it was necessary to stuff the scarf in my back pocket (Mr. Lillard prefers his assistants to approach him dressed in primary colors). Little did I know that in rearranging my wardrobe, I was communicating not a lackadaisical fashion sense, rather, an intimate invitation to get my armpits sucked.
Heaven forbid I had worn said scarf with my red and white gingham skirt, as the invitation would clearly have read "armpits / park sex -TOP". To coordinate your wardrobe to match your sexual preferences, I urge you to read on...
