free food, a miniseries

so i just went to shake shack in madison square park and they had an extra hot dog and so they gave it to me. and i was like, oh no not on earth day hot dogs are the worst, but then i was like, thanks earth for this hot dog! and then we skipped back to work together.

but next i came back to my desk and there was this piece of chocolate cake on the desk, just staring at me all brown and frosted. now i haven't a clue as to where this cake originated, but i sure as hell am eating it, stat. i might as well put it out there, i am TERRIBLY susceptible to poisoning.



so i know that there is freeganism in which vegans break their vegan oaths to jesus when someone gives them something free, but i want to propose something new, and that is "freegusting".

Freegusting - noun, adjective, adverb. north american. Freegusting - when you receive an inordinate amount of free food that if you had individually purchased and eaten might be considered disgusting, but when given to you for free to ingest, you just have to celebrate life for ruling even if you are disgusting. Freegusting.